


When Will You See?

by wonderlandswurst



Category: Alice in Wonderland (Movies - Burton)
Genre: Alternate Ending, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Goodbyes, Happy Ending, Romance, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-08
Updated: 2018-07-31
Packaged: 2019-06-07 04:11:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,096
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15210698
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wonderlandswurst/pseuds/wonderlandswurst
Summary: Goodbyes were always hard for Alice. But with the feeling that she might never be able to return, it was almost impossible, especially when a particularly mad hatter is involved.[A remake of the ending of Through the Looking Glass . . . Tarrant x Alice]





	1. Alice

"You did it, Alice! An impossible thing," Mallymkun, the dormouse, said, using Bayard's ear to wipe his tears away. 

"Not as impossible as saying goodbye to you, my friends," Alice replied, and she meant it. 

Fighting back tears wasn't always this hard, thought Alice as she looked at each and every one of her friends. A bittersweet feeling swelled up in her chest as she looked at them and remembered every moment they spent together. Although short, they were enough to last a lifetime. 

She would always remember them all. Bayard, the kind bloodhound who'd helped her save the Underworld the first time. Chessur, the sly little kitty who'd saved the Hatter's life. Mallymkun, who'd saved her from the Bandersnatch the very first time she returned to Underland. Thackery, the funny little march hare who'd offered her plenty of good laughs and delicious scones. Tweedledee and Tweedledum, who could keep her listening to their countless stories for hours on end. And last but not least, Nivens, the rabbit who'd brought her back here. 

She wished that she had more time to spend with all of them, but she knew that she had to go back to her world. She had to fix everything with her own family, or else she'd regret it forever. Instead, she promised. She promised herself that once everything was okay, she would come back and stay for good. For now, she had to gather all her strength and say goodbye for a while— a while that could possibly last forever. 

While that in itself was hard, there was something even harder. That was saying goodbye to Tarrant. 

Her hands were cold as he held them, his warmth spreading through her. His skin felt rough and calloused beneath hers, but she savored it for it made her whole body tingle— the way it would every time they touched. She closed her eyes, drinking in the sensations before she opened them and met with his. 

Suddenly, she forgot how to breathe. Those bright eyes of his were drawing her in, and she didn't mind drowning in them. 

It was just like the first time she'd met him. After falling through a rabbit hole, and meeting so many peculiar things, she'd been so relieved to finally see someone human! Except, he wasn't quite like the people back in London. He was... different— in a good way! His smile was inviting, and eyes were exciting, a deadly combination that pulled her in. They told her many fun and exciting moments were to come, and they were right. 

Now, sadly, she had to say goodbye once more, and maybe for the last time. 

Knowing that, she didn't want to go back. If it meant she could stay here with him, then she would gladly give up her life in her own world. Here, she could enjoy endless days just goofing around with their friends and having crazy tea parties with the Hatter. Though it was probably reckless, nothing else sounded quite as good as spending the rest of her life with him. What else could you expect from a girl who's been in love with the same man since childhood? 

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, the feelings that she'd hidden since the very first time she entered this wonderland ready to burst out. But when she opened her eyes, she saw sadness in his eyes. It tore her resolve into pieces because he was sad. Not in the way that screamed sadness for a love that was saying goodbye, but in the way that whispered disappointment for a playmate that had to go. It was the exact same look that he had the first time she had to leave. 

More tears pricked at her eyes as the throbbing in her chest grew increasingly painful. After all this time, she was still nothing more than a toy that brought exciting adventures along with it. She still meant nothing to him while he meant everything to her. 

Did she really want to give up her life for a man who didn't love her the same way? 

Though the answer was obvious, the hurt overpowered her desire and all that she could managed to say was, "Goodbye, Hatter." 

Turning her back on him, she stepped into the mirror, although she let her hand linger in his for as long as she could, savoring the last few moments of contact they had. "Goodbye, Alice," his voice followed after. It saddened her how the last word she'd hear from him were goodbye, and not the words she'd always wanted to hear... But she was thankful that his voice kept her company, echoing around her a she traveled back to her own world. She would savor it and remember it for sure. 

Once she had returned, she closed her eyes and took a few deep breaths. Slowly, she turned around and looked into the mirror, expecting to see skin as white as snow and bright orange hair as crazy as a wild forest, but instead was met with her own reflection. Her skin was paler than ever— almost as if she'd never seen the sun— and dark circles hung around her dark brown eyes. She looked utterly horrid, but that didn't matter to her. Reaching a hand up to the mirror, she pressed it flat again the surface. It felt hard and cool under her fingers, and that was the moment she felt the finality of it all. 

But she promised. She promised herself that she'd go back once she'd fixed everything. Once that happened, she told herself, she would tell the Hatter just how much she loved him. If he still didn't feel the same, then she would make him look at her properly— to see her as a woman, not a toy or a friend. She didn't have time to mope around. The sooner she fixed things, the sooner she could return. 


	2. Tarrant

The first time Alice had set foot in Underland, she was only seven. As innocent as she was, she was terrified of what their world had to offer. She'd met a number of things, from talking flowers to a cat that loved to appear and disappear. With not a single person in sight, the girl was just about to give up and break down... Until she chanced upon a lovely tea party. There, she met the Hatter, together with the March Hare and the Dormouse. 

They'd welcomed her to their tea party with open arms, singing songs and telling stories. Although that was the usual setting, it was much more exciting with someone new to play with. Being a local in Underworld, Tarrant already knew almost everything that there was to know about everything. It was a pleasant feeling to know everything, but at the same time it was also rather boring since everything became predictable. So when Alice had arrived, stringing along new tales, he was ecstatic! It was like reading a book that he hadn't read before— new and exciting, keeping him at the edge of his seat every time he opened it up. 

She told them stories of cats and rats who couldn't speak, along with stories of adventures on the sea. It was unlike anything in Underland! It intrigued the Hatter, and left a question on his mind: what would it be like to live in her world? 

He imagined living in her world, where everybody needed jobs to make money and buy what they wanted. He could be a hatter, as Alice had once said, and she would help him run his shop. There, he could do so many things, and he didn't have to worry about any queen telling him what to do. He imagined himself walking around with unfamiliar faces and unfamiliar buildings everywhere he went. How exciting it would be to find out more about them all! Maybe he would even go on adventures with Alice and her father, sailing the seas. He wondered how it would feel to have the harsh wind blow around him, the smell of salt water engulfing everything, and to come home to a place that _truly_ felt like home. 

Yes, living in her world would be nice. 

* * *

The day went by faster than they would have liked and before they knew it, it was already time for Alice to return home. She had a wonderful time with them all, but she had to go. If she didn't go now, she wouldn't be able to return forever, as she was told. But, at the same time, she might not be able to return here again. The thought trampled over the happiness of the hours they spent laughing and giggling. She wished that she had more time to talk to them all, most especially the strange man with a head of crazy, bright orange curls. 

Although the group knew it was something necessary, they were still extremely reluctant to say goodbye. The atmosphere was heavy around them as they bowed their heads, lifting it only slightly to peek at her. The Hatter even took off his hat to suit the mood. 

Truth be told, Tarrant was disappointed at the fact that Alice had to return home. He wanted to talk to her more, to find out more about her world and the things in it. Once she leaves, he would be surrounded by the all too familiar scenery, and left alone with an endless number of what if's. He wanted— no, _needed_ to know more. He needed to understand her world completely. With what he had learned that day, they were barely even scratching the surface! He wanted to know more, and he didn't think that he could be patient enough to wait for the next time that Alice would return. 

With his lower lip jutting out in a small pout, he looked up at the little girl and found that her face was sullen. _"She must have been caught up in our world, just like we got caught up in hers,"_ he thought. She looked just as reluctant to leave as they were to let her go. Her eyebrows knit together and forming lines on her forehead, while her lips formed a cute pout. Her eyes were teary, full of sadness— as if she had to leave something very dear. 

It was the exact same expression she had on now, although this one seemed to hold an even deeper sadness. She was much older now, and held a kind of melancholic grace as she moved. It amazed him how much she'd grown. In the few years that she hadn't returned to Underland, she managed to grow into this fine young woman. She'd changed so much, he still had a hard time believing that this was the same Alice from all those years ago. On the other hand, everyone in Underland was still the same, just a little bit older. 

Although this wasn't the first time they had to say goodbye to her, it felt just as sad as the first time, or maybe even more. It was the second time Alice had returned, the first time being when she slayed the Jabberwocky. Despite that, the time they spent together felt too short. As soon as she stepped foot in Underland, things would get hectic and none of them would have any time to be fooling around. Although Tarrant did love a good adventure to shake up his boring old routine, what he would love more is to hear more stories about Alice's world. After all those years he's spent daydreaming, nothing would be better than hearing more about it. After all, the more he heard, the closer he was to understanding her and her world. 

The fact that he would have to wait for her to return again ate at him, so he tried to persuade her to stay, like he did before. And just like the last time, it wasn't effective. She did want to stay, but before she could, she had to fix things in her own world. He understood why, but that didn't stop the disappointment from swelling up in his chest. 

He looked into her eyes, trying to find confirmation that she would no doubt return and bring hundreds among thousands of stories. Unfortunately, he couldn't find it. In fact, he couldn't find anything. Her dark brown eyes were searching for something in his, but in the last few seconds, they screamed hurt and disappointment. 

"Goodbye, Hatter," she said. 

He was taken aback, unable to say anything as Alice turned away from him. She stepped into the mirror, holding onto his hand up until the last moment where she entered the mirror completely. He was dazed, continuing to look into the mirror that she'd gone into. The look of utter hurt and disappointment she wore was etched into his mind, leaving him with only one question. 

_Why?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! This one was written last April, 2017, and I published it on Quotev. I remember writing this at 6 am, right after binging the two movies. Ah, such good times. I had another chapter in the works, an ending for this piece, but it’s just been sitting in my files for over a year now haha… I plan to finish it and upload it soon, but just in case I don’t, don’t wait for it!


	3. The End

Making his way up the narrow road, the Hatter smiled, humming a tune he’d picked up on his most recent adventure. With his knapsack filled to the brim, and a stroller in each hand, he should have felt weighed down. Instead, he felt as light as a feather. To him, it felt like he was taking a stroll, with nothing weighing him down, and although the road home was long, he felt energetic. Each step he took brought him a little closer to home, sweet home.

By the time he burst through the door of his house, he was already belting out lyrics to his own song. “I’m home, I’m home, I’m home!” he sang, kicking the door open and dropping his bags. He stepped inside, closing his eyes as he breathed in the familiar scent of wood, books, and all the materials he used to make his hats. Slowly opening his eyes, he looked around, relishing the familiarity of it all. Although everything had collected quite a thick layer of dust, he was still glad to be back.

“Nothing feels quite as good as coming back home after a long trip,” he said. He picked up the bags he’d dropped by the doorway, quickly putting them down somewhere in the room before slipping the overstuffed bag off his back and laying it against the other bags. Dusting his hands off, his eyes surveyed the room, looking for something in particular. “Aha!” he exclaimed, eyes landing on a notebook laying on the table, just like he’d left it.

Smiling widely, he made his way towards it and took a seat on the cushioned chair. Dust blew up around him, but he paid no mind to it, keeping all his attention on the object at hand. “Of course, the first thing I must do is this,” he said to himself. Blowing off some of the dust, he opened the notebook and scanned the pages. His eyes ate up every word that was in it, all written in his very own writing. But more than halfway through, it came to a stop. Everything after was all blank pages, each one waiting for a new story to be written on them. A new story written to preserve his memories for a special someone to hear.

“Ah, pen! I need a pen,” Tarrant mumbled, feeling around his pockets for a pen. When he finally managed to fish one out, he cheered in triumph before getting to work. He uncapped the pen with his teeth and started to write. The words seemed to flow smoothly, from his thoughts to the paper. He recalled his recent adventure from a neighboring country and smiled, remembering all the fun he had.

Yes, a few years ago, the Hatter had started to travel around. Although it was under the name of the White Queen, he was still able to wander around and explore. Everywhere he went, he would always find something new and interesting, whether it was a person, a place, or an object. And every single time, he would ask himself the same thing, _“Would she like this?”_

That was mainly the reason he wrote everything down in this journal. He thought that she would love to hear about his journeys, so he wrote them down in case he forgot anything. And over time, the number of journals increased, most of them being stored in his shelves.  

“She’ll definitely love this one,” he said, scribbling down the last few words.

“Who will?” someone asked.

“Why, who else but my dear Alice?” he replied, putting the pen down and closing the journal. He tucked the pen back in his coat pocket and adjusted the position of the journal before turning to face Mirana, the White Queen.

She sighed, a small, knowing smile gracing her lips, “Always thinking about Alice, I see.”

“She’s going to come back one day, and when she does, I’ll tell her all about my adventures. She’ll love it, wouldn’t she?” he asked, his eyes holding nothing but hope.

“Of course she will,” the queen said, “but Tarrant, I wonder…”

“Wonder what, my queen?”

“Do you,” she paused, looking at him with calculating eyes, “love Alice?”

“Of course!” he answered without a second thought, “Why wouldn’t I?”

The queen shook her head with mirth. Although she’d already expected this, she couldn’t help being amused hearing it in person. She chuckled, deciding to get the answer she was looking for one way or another. She knew Tarrant, and she knew just which buttons to push.

“Then tell me… What do you want?” she asked.

“What I want…” he mumbled, trailing off as he began to think.

“Well, I want Alice to come back. When she does, I want her to meet my family. Then, I want to tell her about all my adventures— and I want to hear about hers too. I want to sit at a table with her, and drink tea while she tells me about her world. I want to make hats with her around to see them. I want to see her dark brown eyes and blonde hair. I want to feel her smooth, pale skin once more. I want to spend more time with her. I want her to stay. I want—”

“Isn’t that love?”

Tarrant froze.

In all the years he’s spend yearning for her return, not once has that crossed his mind. The sudden mention of it left him speechless. In fact, he couldn’t even form a coherent thought. He slowly turned to look at his guest, his mouth open as if to say something. The queen looked at him with a pleasant smile, waiting for him to say something. When he didn’t, she took that as her cue to leave.

“Well, it’s about time I head back now,” she started, turning gracefully on her heel before pausing. She looked back,  “Oh, and welcome back.”

As she made her way out of his house, the queen smiled to herself. Everything went just as she’d thought. It was perfect! Just a little more, and the pieces would all come together.

 

* * *

 

“Perfect!” Alice exclaimed, scribbling her signature onto the paper. Raising the paper up, she scanned through its contents, an excited grin etched onto her face. After sealing the deal with one of the biggest and most trustworthy companies in London, she could finally say that everything was settled. Everything was stable, and she could leave without a problem.

Her mother had settled down a few years ago, choosing to live with Margaret, Alice’s older sister. From there, she would help Alice sort out all the paperwork. And in the few years that had passed, the youngest Kingsleigh was able to rebuild her father’s company from the ground up. Perhaps she had brought it more glory that it ever had! She’d built up a respectable amount of wealth, and by signing this contract, they were practically set for life! Because of that, she could finally leave the company to her mother and sister. They could at least handle some monthly paperwork.

The blonde felt accomplished as she started making her way home. She’d spent all those days, weeks, months, _years_ working to reach this point because once she did, she could finally rest. Not just for a few days, but for good. After making sure that her family was in good hands, she could focus on herself, and, of course, that meant returning to Underland and catching the heart of a certain mad hatter.

“Just you wait, Tarrant,” she said to herself, her eyes twinkling mischievously.

Once she arrived home, she went through her things frantically. Laying papers and documents down on her desk, she reread them carefully. She wanted to make sure that everything was truly settled before leaving. Grabbing a clean sheet of paper from a drawer, she began writing a letter addressed to her mother and sister, explaining to them how she would be embarking on a long journey, and entrusting them with the business that she had built. Hastily, she sealed the letter with her insignia and set it at the center of her desk.

She rushed to her bedroom, where she laid an empty bag on the bed. She rummaged around her things, grabbing certain objects and trinkets. These were the souvenirs that she’d collected for her friends over the years— things she was sure they would like. She wanted to pack light, so she took only the things she thought they would love the most. She was sure to pack at least one for each of her friends.

She was nearly done checking off her mental checklist when she caught sight of her bookshelf. They were full of journals, each filled the adventures she’d gone on since her return from Underland. She wasn’t sure when she would be able to return, and was afraid of forgetting even the most minute detail, so she wrote them down in hopes of telling them to Tarrant one day. She knew that he would love them.

A rush of excitement coursed through her body at the thought that she would finally be able to share these stories with the hatter. She would finally be able to feel his presence by her side, hear his boisterous laughter, and see his eyes light up with excitement. She closed her eyes, a small smile playing on her lips as she imagined the scene playing out. She could almost feel it as if it were real.

Upon opening them, she made her way to the shelves and gathered all the journals. She placed them in the bag she’d laid out, making sure to maximize the space. Zipping up her bag, she was just about ready to go. She straightened out her clothes and picked up her bag before turning to leave the room, but something caught her attention in the corner of her eye. They were a bunch of pictures laid out on her dresser. Pausing, she took a moment to study them.

One of the photographs was of her mother, another of her sister. Others held pictures of them all together, and others related to milestones in her career. Her eyes began to sting with tears at the thought of leaving everything behind. She would miss them, just like she’d been missing the people of Underland all this time. There was nothing left for her to do here, though. Aside from maintaining the business she’d rebuilt, there was nothing. Her life was in Underland, more adventures just waiting to unfold.

Alice let her eyes flutter closed, taking in deep breaths as she regained her composure. She wiped away the moisture from her eyes and smiled fondly as she took the pictures and carefully placed them in her bag. With that, she felt like she was truly ready to leave.

She stood in front of the mirror, squaring her shoulders as if preparing to face an audience before relaxing. She stepped closer, placing a hand its smooth surface and closing her eyes. She prayed silently, pleading the gods for a way back to her friends. Feeling a presence enter her room, she opened her eyes to see a stunning blue butterfly perched right beside her hand. She smiled.

_Absolem._

A moment later, she felt the hard surface underneath her hand melt into something resembling liquid silver. She gave the butterfly a meaningful look, and wasted no time stepping into the mirror.

 

* * *

 

 

Alice found herself by the gates of the white castle. The sight of it so familiar and so nostalgic, she couldn’t stop herself from smiling. She noted that no one seemed to be around the area, taking in the silence of her surroundings. Carrying her bag in one hand, she began walking, looking around the empty premises and praying that nothing had happened to the people.

Just as she approached the entrance of the castle, she heard light footsteps behind her. She sighed in relief, but braced herself for the worst. When she turned around, she was met with a beautiful woman with skin as white as her hair. The white queen. The blonde felt her shoulders sag with relief, a face-splitting grin taking over her features.

“Mirana!”

“Alice, what are you doing here? You’re late!” the queen responded, eyes wide with urgency, “Come, now, everyone’s waiting for you.” She took the girl by the wrist and guided her around the castle with graceful speed.

“Late to what?” Alice asked, jogging to keep up. Her eyes darted around the greenery that surrounded the exterior of the castle, trying to figure out where she was being taken.

“To the party, of course!” the queen answered, not missing a beat. Although Alice had no idea what party she was referring to, she decided not to ask any more and settled with trying to keep up with the lady. It was a wonder how she managed to move so quickly without running.

It wasn’t long before they had reached their destination, and Alice found herself face-to-face with old friends. They were gathered around a table, an assortment of drinks and pastries set out on its surface. She was barely able to process what had happened when she was enveloped in a crushing hug, her friends surrounding her. Their voices resonated around her in a chorus, but it wasn’t hard for her to pick them out.

She recognized the relaxed yet sly tone of Chessur’s words, Thackery’s crazed muttering, and Bayard’s deep and soothing voice. She laughed at the twins’ bickering, smiled at Mallymkun’s tiny but brave proclamations, and rolled her eyes in good humor as Nivens shot her countless worried questions about how she’d gotten there. Even the old red queen, Iracebeth, was present, greeting the girl with a sheepish grin.

Everyone was present, except for one person. Alice peeked over the bodies pressed against her, eyes searching for the snow white skin and bright orange hair she’d dreamed of countless nights. Her eyes met with Mirana’s, and the latter seemed to understand the unspoken question. Her eyes twinkled knowingly, and she gracefully pulled her guests off the young blonde.

“Now, now, give the girl some space,” she spoke, patting down the skirt of her dress. A chorus of apologies rung out as they shuffled to give Alice more space. “The hatter hasn’t arrived, it seems,” she addressed the girl’s silent question, “Perhaps he’s forgotten about the party. Would you mind paying him a visit and reminding him, Alice?”

“Of course not,” Alice replied, giving the queen a grateful smile. She turned to her friends, bending down to better match their heights. They looked disappointed that she had to leave, but she reassured them that she would be back with the hatter soon.

“I have some gifts for you all,” she said, giving them a hasty hug, “I’ll give them to you guys when I get back.”

 

* * *

 

Excitement coursed through Alice’s veins as she made her way to the hatter’s house, pushing the white horse Mirana had provided to go faster. When the vibrant hat-shaped house came into view, she couldn’t dismount the horse fast enough and barely processed the fact that her legs were running up the narrow path to the house. She stopped by the door, taking a moment to catch her breath and fix her appearance before knocking.

“Who is it?” she heard him call out from inside.

Wanting to keep her arrival a surprise, she held her tongue and bit her lip, unable to stop the smile from forming on her face. It took everything in her not to make a sound as she listened to the hatter stumble around, knocking a few things over as he made his way to the door. “Thackery, if that’s you again, I’m going to kick you right off this cliff!” she heard him curse, his voice louder now that he was closer.

Seconds later, the door swung open, and Tarrant found himself staring down at a pair of shoes. The scowl on his face twisted into a look of confusion. He had been expecting to see the march hare, here to ramble on and on about tea and scones again. His eyes trailed up from the polished leather shoes, up a simple yet pretty blue dress, to a pair of piercing brown eyes.

He froze, unable to believe who he was seeing. The words that he had prepared for this moment got caught in his throat, and all he could do open and close his mouth. He wondered if he was dreaming. Maybe he had eaten some hallucinatory mushrooms earlier?

Alice looked up at the startled man, an excited grin gracing her features until she was unable to contain her excitement and tackled him into a hug, squealing in delight. Tarrant barely had time to react, but he managed to wrap his arms around her waist in time. His surprise faded into joy as he spun the girl around, their laughter seemingly blending together and bouncing off the walls of the house.

“You— You’re here!” Tarrant stuttered, his eyes almost as wide as his smile. He breathed heavily, keeping his hands on her waist as he rested his forehead against hers.

“I’m here,” Alice responded with a breathless smile.

Being together like this was something they’d both dreamed of for years. Some nights, the dream felt so real— so real that they couldn’t be sure if this was even real. They both had so many stories they wanted to share, and so many memories they wanted to make. Even with time on their sides, they couldn’t wait to start.

“I have so much to tell you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! After basically more than a year, I've finally finished the final chapter ! It's funny because I only actually finished this because I was stuck in my new house without wifi long enough for me to want to pick up writing again... But, well, it's a good thing I guess? I actually finished this before writing Blame It on the Rain and A Bird in the Sea.
> 
> First bit (Hatter's POV up until a bit of Alice's) was written around the same time as the other 2 chapters, so the writing may be different from the rest of it.
> 
> I hope you guys enjoyed this and thanks for reading!


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